Big News + Some Powerful Practices


I have big news to share! On May 27th I married my beloved, Eddy, and we had a love-filled magical wedding ceremony and beautiful celebration with a huge dance party surrounded by some of our favorite family and friends.

Outside of the love and joy and sometimes stress that weddings can bring, now that it’s over there are a few big takeaways in regards to the preparation of it that I’d love to share with you.

Why am I sharing wedding preparation thoughts to my community of Pilates and Core Activation women? Well, this goes way beyond weddings. It’s about being seen more fully in any context. What I’m about to share can be valuable for you or for someone you know, in preparing for ANY big event, or in any context where you’ll be more visible in the world and seen by a lot of people.

Whether you are starting a new job, returning back to work after having a baby, are dating and want to feel yourself embodying even more confidence, are taking new headshots for your business, have a big presentation or project coming up in your career, are getting married yourself, or have any type of event coming up where you will be visible and want to feel confident, grounded, and at home in your body... this is for you!

While in the months leading up to our wedding, I did prepare with some powerful lifestyle practices and physical activity, what I found most important was preparing my energy, spirit, and who I was being so that I could really experience and fully receive this special time.

Whenever you prepare for anything there are the energetic, spiritual and physical components to take into account. This is exactly how I support my clients, so naturally it was the same approach I used for myself to help myself feel grounded, radiant, and open to receiving all the love and positivity surrounding my wedding.

What I did to prepare: 

Calm Your Nervous System

Energetically I helped myself get grounded and calm my nervous system with a simple breathing practice (4-7-8 Breath) that I did at least twice a day, and any time that I felt myself beginning to feel overwhelmed. I also practiced chanting the mantras of the chakras to help me feel more aligned and fully engaged energetically. I chanted the mantras of the chakras 1-7: Lam, Vam, Ram, Yam, Ham, Om, So Hum. I also received support through monthly reiki sessions from gifted Reiki practitioner Elizabeth Piren.

Embody the Energy You Wish to Feel

Spiritually I received support through practicing embodying the energy of the queen and empress. In embodying the energy of the queen I practiced taking up more space, being seen, receiving love, gifts, and appreciation. In embodying the empress I practiced embracing my unique beauty, feeling pleasure, and really taking in joy.

I also allowed myself to feel my feelings around the transition into marriage, this shift in my life, and sorrow that my dad and mom wouldn’t be able to physically attend. I processed this through journaling, speaking with dear loved ones, and allowed the emotions to flow through me.

I also practiced invoking the goddess Lakshmi, the goddess of beauty, abundance, well-being and prosperity. I practiced feeling the presence of Lakshmi surrounding me and our marriage feeling the radiant glow, and flow of abundance within myself, and remembered that any extra goodness, abundance, or prosperity would be overflowing - going out to others in the universe. 

Everyday Lifestyle Tools/Hacks/Tweaks

These practices really have become part of my lifestyle. More than just the tools that I used to prepare for my wedding, they are tools I use every day, and I found them beneficial to include in my prep leading up to the wedding. Rather than a whole lifestyle overhaul, adding in just a few of these practices gently nudge your body and your energy into more balance and alignment inside and out: 

  • Daily dry brushing to get lymph detoxification and stimulate healthy skin and more energy.

  • Exfoliation with sugar or salt scrubs and essential oils that are mood boosting or calming depending on what you feel the need for.

  • Exfoliation with scrubbing cloth, washing face with manuka honey for very gentle daily exfoliation.

  • Eating whole foods and lots of veggies, pushing sugar to the side.

  • Staying hydrated and drinking herbal teas like dandelion root tea and tulsi with ginger tea.

  • Daily movement from walking, biking, Pilates, yoga, swimming.

  • Making a weekly date to do yoga with a girlfriend to not only get to class, but also get in some quality friend time.

  • Meditation regularly to center and focus.

  • Reading a light hearted book to lift my spirits.

  • Doing Creative projects for the wedding and for my own full expression.

  • Entertainment through watching Game of Thrones as an outlet. :)

Again, don’t try to do ALL of these at once, rather pick 2 or 3 that really speak to you now.

Get Your Creative Juices Flowing

Accessing creativity was a hugely important practice to help me feel connected to myself and my full self expression as well as feel the fire in my belly lit up and have my creative juices flowing. For the wedding, I had some artistic projects that I wanted to do, and what I found was most important was to let myself receive nourishment from the creative act rather than letting myself get into a martyr role with the creative experience as just another thing that I had to get done.

When I found myself being involved in projects where I was feeling rushed and getting in a “doing” mode, and not enjoying it, I made adjustments to help myself feel more spaciousness, and let go of feelings of perfectionism. This allowed me to that really feel the pleasure and joy from the experience.

Practice Receiving

I also practiced receiving so that I could feel open and grounded and available and ready and willing to be seen, to receive the attention, love, and focus that I would on the wedding day. Some of the ways I did this was through practicing visualizing receiving and bringing attention to moments when I was receiving and how it felt.

I visualized being surrounded by all of the loving people that would be attending our wedding ceremony, and allowing myself to begin to feel and receive their presence by seeing and naming them in my mind’s eye, and beginning to open up to receive love and support from all of these people at once. One by one I would name, see, and feel the love & presence of each of our guests. I first began with my family, the next day I added on Eddy’s family as well, and then I added on circles of friends, until I was naming, visualizing and practicing receiving from our entire guest list.

This practice is a powerful way to prepare yourself for any time that you will be receiving attention from a large number of people and want to feel grounded and present. I was aware that it may feel overwhelming to be surrounded by so many loved ones all at the same time and receive more love than I ever have before all at the same moment. This visualization helped me stay present and really aware in the moment on our wedding day, as it was already familiar in my mind and body to see each person and feel their love and presence.

Imagine, during a time in your life when you may feel anxiety & nerves mixed in with a deep desire to feel calm, confident, and present, that you are feeling connected to your center. That’s the power of these practices to help you feel grounded, open to receiving and being visible.

Now back to you, I'd love to hear what you are seeing for yourself -  

Do you have any big events coming up?
Are you wanting to be more visible in your life?
What might be possible if you incorporated 2 or 3 of these practices?

I invite you to start with one small simple step.

Fran Darnell